Jokes from the wife ...
Posted: Wed Jul 29, 2009 3:55 pm
In my mail this morning I found a wee bit from Eileen. This was written by another woman, certainly not MY wife!
~~~
MEN!!!!
One day my housework-challenged husband decided
to wash his Sweatshirt.
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room,
he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the
washing machine?'
'It depends,' I replied.
'What does it say on your shirt?'
He yelled back, ' OHIO STATE ! '
And they say
blondes are dumb....
----------------------------------------------------------------
A couple is lying
in bed. The man says,
'I am g oing to make
you the happiest woman in the world...'
The woman replies,
'I'll miss you........
----------------------------
'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,'
Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the
neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'
'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.
-------------------------------------------
Q: What do you
call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
-------------------------------------------
Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him;
and Patience for his moods.
Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat him to death.
AMEN
-----------------------------------------------------
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be
men.
0A--------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you
call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy..
------------------------------------------
Q: What does it
mean when a man is in your bed gasping
for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
------------------------- ----------------
Q: Why do men whistle when they
are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them remember which end to wipe..
------------------------------------------
Q: How do you
keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the
email folder 'Instruction Manuals'
~~~
MEN!!!!
One day my housework-challenged husband decided
to wash his Sweatshirt.
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room,
he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the
washing machine?'
'It depends,' I replied.
'What does it say on your shirt?'
He yelled back, ' OHIO STATE ! '
And they say
blondes are dumb....
----------------------------------------------------------------
A couple is lying
in bed. The man says,
'I am g oing to make
you the happiest woman in the world...'
The woman replies,
'I'll miss you........
----------------------------
'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,'
Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the
neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'
'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.
-------------------------------------------
Q: What do you
call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
-------------------------------------------
Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him;
and Patience for his moods.
Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat him to death.
AMEN
-----------------------------------------------------
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be
men.
0A--------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you
call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy..
------------------------------------------
Q: What does it
mean when a man is in your bed gasping
for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
------------------------- ----------------
Q: Why do men whistle when they
are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them remember which end to wipe..
------------------------------------------
Q: How do you
keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the
email folder 'Instruction Manuals'
