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the British

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 11:20 pm
by :FI:Sneaky_Russian
Charlie the Dog wrote:Being British!!
Body: Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.

And the most British thing of all?
Suspicion of anything foreign.

Oh and......

-Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
-Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
-Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke.
-Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
-Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap
lawn mower in the garage.
-Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
-Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.

NOT TO MENTION...

3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.
31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.
19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.
British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents.
101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.
18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.
A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last three years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of Control Scalextric cars.

And Finally.........

In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst
throwing up into the toilet. I am proud to be British.
IF YOUR PROUD TO BE BRITISH THEN YOU'LL REPOST THIS!
(We might be British but hell were funny as!!)

Re: the British

Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 12:35 am
by :FI:IceFrog
now i know why me family left the old country :D

Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 12:53 am
by :FI:Murph
Hate to be a wet blanket, but all the items listed as "only in Britain" are also true of the USA.

Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 1:09 am
by :FI:Sneaky_Russian
:FI:Murph wrote:Hate to be a wet blanket, but all the items listed as "only in Britain" are also true of the USA.
Dont be too tough Charlies just a dog (allegedly) :badgrin:

Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 10:35 pm
by Menace
Pretty much how we are in the Maritimes eh? :lol:

Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 10:35 pm
by fighter_bomber
Whats wrong with disabled parking spots by the ice rink lol?
And to add something to it, 1 briton was injured last month after being hit by a BIG low whistle in the pub... Don't ask me...
8-[

Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 11:21 pm
by :FI:IceFrog
:FI:Murph wrote:Hate to be a wet blanket, but all the items listed as "only in Britain" are also true of the USA.
Yeah, a lot of that happens here Murph. But I wonder if it’s like California where one could qualify and buy a house this month but if you wait two months later to buy the same house you couldn’t afford it.

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 1:22 am
by :FI:Murph
Those low "D" whistles can give you a pretty bad concussion- was a bodhran player responsible?

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:04 pm
by fighter_bomber
No, it was meleodeon player :shock:

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:05 pm
by fighter_bomber
Adds a whole new meaning to the Fighting Irish eh?

Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 11:16 am
by :FI:Sneaky_Russian
Well I've just had a typical English Breakfast.


. . . . Cold Chicken Biryani left over from the night before. :badgrin:

Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 4:22 pm
by Skipper
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Posted: Fri Jun 30, 2006 7:19 pm
by fighter_bomber
Typical English--- is to build a bridge over the River Kwai then immediatley blow it up again.

Posted: Fri Jun 30, 2006 7:46 pm
by :FI:Sneaky_Russian
Ah - but if they never built the bridge they would'nt have got the Jap train.

Posted: Fri Jun 30, 2006 8:10 pm
by :FI:IceFrog
:FI:Sneaky_Russian wrote:Ah - but if they never built the bridge they would'nt have got the Jap train.
neverthought of it that way :D you English...................